This blog article is part of a series of blog articles about the six Sexual Health Principles developed by Doug Braun-Harvey. You can learn more about the principles, Doug, and his work at his website.
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Let’s start with what ‘exploitation’ means and work backward from there. Exploitation is treating someone unfairly in order to gain benefit. Usually, this involves leveraging power or privilege in order to get someone to do what will benefit us. An example of exploitation might be an employer hinting that someone’s job might be on the line when asking if anyone will “volunteer” extra time during off-hours for a work project. The employer is leveraging their power as the boss to exploit the employees time and labor.
What does exploitation have to do with sexual health?
Sexual exploitation is when someone leverages power, control, status, or authority to get sexual gratification. Exploiting someone for sex takes away that individual's ability to consent freely and without fear of harm, danger, or retaliation. Think of a boss or a police officer abusing their power to make someone agree to have sex so they don’t lose their job or get arrested. In romantic relationships, exploitation may look like one (or both) partners engaging in some form of infidelity while remaining in the primary relationship, which exploits the partner’s trust in the relationship.
These dynamics, no matter the context in which they occur, can be exceptionally harmful and erode an individual’s sense of comfort, confidence, and safety. Sexual health can never include exploitation.
Ensuring non-exploitation
How does one ensure that sexual behaviors align with non-exploitation? The first step is to know and communicate your boundaries to everyone involved in a sexual encounter. The partner(s) hearing those boundaries must respect them and not attempt to ‘convince’ or ‘pressure’ you into a sexual act they are not comfortable with. Persuading someone to have sex or do something sexual in exchange for something is never okay.
Another way to ensure non-exploitation is to listen to yourself, your body, and your limits in the moment and be able to express those feelings to either stop, change, or communicate about what is happening. An exploitive response to this might be your partner continuing the sexual act anyway despite the voiced discomfort. A non-exploitative sexual encounter would be paused or stopped if either partner is feeling ‘icky’ about it and space would be given to explore the concerns.
Feel free to read the rest of the articles in this blog series:
Sexual Health Principle 1: Consent
Sexual Health Principle 2: Non-Exploitation (this article)
Sexual Health Principle 3: Honesty
Sexual Health Principle 4: Shared Values
Sexual Health Principle 5: Protected from STI, HIV, and Unwanted Pregnancy
